An article published in The Atlantic last month discussed the documented health risks of long-term unresolved conflicts. According to a study by researchers at the University of Copenhagen published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, “stressful social situations are associated with increased mortality risk among middle-aged men and women.” You can see the full article here.
The article focused on conflict in close social relationships—primarily families and marriages—but it is not difficult to extrapolate the results to the workplace. As we spend more and more time with coworkers and the lines between professional and personal continue to blur, workplace conflicts take on greater significance. The way that you, as a leader and executive, navigate those conflicts not only affects your executive presence and the morale of your team, but also your health.
Instead of merely managing conflict, strive toward a culture that proactively embraces constructive conflict as a creative force for innovation. Research shows that the potential for innovative outcomes is highest in environments of moderate conflict. Teams that engage in healthy conflict are more creative, have closer bonds with each other and arrive at effective solutions more quickly than those that avoid it.
Here are three tips to help you and your team embrace conflict:
1. Appoint a “Devil’s Advocate”: When it’s time to make a decision, appoint one or more team members to intentionally support an opposing point of view. This helps ensure that solutions are tested and challenged before implementation. Often, consciously creating opposing viewpoints leads to more creative, deeper solutions.
2. Set Ground Rules for Conflict: Establishing “conflict best practices” for your team can go a long way toward normalizing and encouraging creative conflict. Making sure that everyone feels safe and supported in expressing their opinions, even if they are contrary to your own, fosters a greater trust and increases team morale.
3. Reframe Conflict as an Opportunity: In many cases, what first appears to be a conflict is actually an opportunity for growth and an expansion of understanding. Before engaging, consider what you or your employee may be able to learn from the conversation and allow this constructive framing to inform your approach. For example, instead of assigning blame when something goes awry, look for the chance to coach, teach or learn. The ideal outcome of a workplace conflict isn’t “winning,” but rather building a stronger relationship to get better results in the future.
Realistically, even the most conflict-friendly environments experience flare-ups of high-level destructive conflict. This can look like a blowup in moments of stress, missed deadlines, or passive-aggressive gossip. In cases where negative conflict arises, try these techniques:
1. Take a Moment to Center: When we are angry, we often move from an impulsive place without regard for the long-, or even near-, term ramifications of our actions. This is because, when triggered, we can physiologically experience an emotion before we are even cognitively aware we’re having it. We feel the impulse and can act in less than a second. However, once we’re aware of that impulse to act, there’s a period of time before action called the “refractory period.” During this time, our brain seeks out evidence to reinforce what we believe to be true in that moment. If we can become aware that we are in the refractory period, we can challenge ourselves to find evidence contrary to what we believe is true. Try this exercise to test your assumptions: write down all the objective evidence that supports what you believe to be true about the situation. Next write down all objective evidence that goes against what you believe is true. Often through simply taking a step back and examining all the evidence and challenging our own assumptions, we find a solution we didn’t realize even existed.
2. Communicate Clearly: A good percentage of workplace conflict results from a lack of understanding. Make sure that your team clearly understands your expectations and their responsibilities. At the same time, make sure that you understand their point of view. The disconnect between a leader’s expectations and a team member’s understanding of their role can not only lead to conflict, it can also lead to a general sense of unease and decrease your presence in the office.
3. Keep it Face to Face: Email, IM, and texting are great tools for rapid communication. But in moments of conflict, face to face is best. Remember that emotions are contagious, so before engaging, take a moment to adjust your mindset and frame the conversation positively.
Conflict can be a powerful tool for growth and innovation. On the flip side, it can also be destructive. The key is to embrace conflict and build your expertise in navigating negative conflict that may arise.
How do you navigate conflict in the workplace? What has worked for you and what is still challenging?