A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about “everyday talk” and what it reveals about your organization. The language that we hear and use every day shapes our world and our perception of ourselves. Some of this language and behavior may reveal latent assumptions and prejudices and, in doing do, become a form of “microaggression.”
Prominent researcher Professor Derald Wing Sue of Columbia University defines a microaggression as the everyday verbal, nonverbal, and environmental slights, snubs, or insults, whether intentional or unintentional, which communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative messages to target persons based solely upon their marginalized group membership. These microaggressions may invalidate the experiential reality of the target persons, demean them on a personal or group level, communicate that they are somehow lesser, or even tacitly threaten.
One of the challenges of dealing with microaggressions is that neither the aggressor nor the target may be aware that they are happening. Here are some examples that may crop up in the workplace:
• When arriving for a meeting, the guests automatically assume that the man in the room is the superior or manager.
• An assertive female manager is described as a “bitch” while her male counterpart is described as a “forceful leader.”
• A comment, perhaps intended as a compliment, is given about how properly a minority speaks English.
Each of these carries a latent message. Women are more fit to be support or assistants for a capable leader, minorities are less educated or foreigners even in their own country.
These messages, woven, often unconsciously, into small everyday interactions contribute to a feeling of “otherness” in the workplace. A 2014 Catalyst report found that those with characteristics different from those of the dominant group in the workplace often feel as if they don’t fit in. Microaggressions exacerbate this feeling, leading individuals to take on the role of “outsider” on their teams. This makes it difficult for them to build the executive presence needed to advance their career without assuming an inauthentic persona. As one client recently told me: “I feel like I need to leave my Asianness at the door in order to succeed at my company.” Additionally, even by making a coworker inadvertently feel compelled to be less than their true selves, organizations could be missing out on unseen talents and skills that could be leveraged.
We see the impact of this every day. It’s there in the confidence gap that women experience in moving into leadership positions. And it’s there in the composition of our corporate and even national leadership. White males constitute only about a third of the United States population, but make up:
• 92% of the Forbes 400 top executive positions;
• 90% of public school superintendents;
• 80% of the tenured positions in higher education.
The trend plays out across multiple sectors. Microaggressions are not solely responsible for this disparity, but they both reflect assumptions and inherent prejudices as well as perpetuate them.
Here are a few strategies to manage microaggressions:
1. Define yourself and learn to leverage your differences and strengths. Microaggressions derive much of their power from their ability to define the targets, to take away their identity. By being aware of the process at play and consciously defining yourself, you can disrupt the cycle.
2. When you can, give the aggressor the benefit of the doubt. Minority groups definitely are on the receiving end of most microaggressions, but taking on a victim mentality may exacerbate the situation or make you appear hypersensitive. Take a deep breath, ask calmly for clarification, and notice the response you get. It may be that the aggressor had no idea that he or she committed any sort of offense and will be more aware in the future.
3. Know when to raise awareness and when to let it go. There is some interesting unpublished research about what is “normal” or standard “noise” in interactions compared to what qualifies as a “microaggression.” While it would be nice to live in a world where people only say nice things about each other, this is not the case. Taking umbrage at every negative note or adjective directed at us may not help. Pick your battles and…
4. If you do choose to raise awareness, focus on the event, language, or behavior instead of the person.
Raising awareness about microaggressions is key to shifting our culture and to changing the way that others perceive minorities and women. And to changing the way that we see ourselves.